For the final installment of this surprisingly long series, I’m going to go completely off the rails and spend 300 words on wizard school cutlery.
Silverware: A Technical Consideration
This one takes some explanation. I was recently thinking about the scene in The Goblet of Fire where Hagrid accidentally stabs the little music teacher with a fork. This made me think about how, presumably, Hogwarts needs a lot of silverware to serve all their students and faculty, three times a day, roughly 8 months out of the year. Even with some kind of magic dishwashing spell that's still a lot of silverware.
To some extent this is true of plates, goblets, etc. as well, but there are many different style of plates and goblets and things, and some styles are more fitting a wizard school than others. Silverware, however, is pretty interchangeable.
For example, I once spent a summer studying at Harvard University. As such, I ate almost all of my meals in their main dining hall, which is, predictably, very nice. It's a converted church building complete with hand carved wood inlay, arches, and stained glass. In fact, it looks almost identical to the Hogwarts dining hall.
Silverware: A Technical Consideration
This one takes some explanation. I was recently thinking about the scene in The Goblet of Fire where Hagrid accidentally stabs the little music teacher with a fork. This made me think about how, presumably, Hogwarts needs a lot of silverware to serve all their students and faculty, three times a day, roughly 8 months out of the year. Even with some kind of magic dishwashing spell that's still a lot of silverware.
To some extent this is true of plates, goblets, etc. as well, but there are many different style of plates and goblets and things, and some styles are more fitting a wizard school than others. Silverware, however, is pretty interchangeable.
For example, I once spent a summer studying at Harvard University. As such, I ate almost all of my meals in their main dining hall, which is, predictably, very nice. It's a converted church building complete with hand carved wood inlay, arches, and stained glass. In fact, it looks almost identical to the Hogwarts dining hall.
The fact I was there studying witchcraft is purely coincidentalAnd do you know what kind of silverware they had there? The exact same steel, functional silverware they've had at every other college dining hall or cafeteria I've ever been to, because no matter how fancy it is, day-to-day silverware all looks the same.
This raises a very weird technical question in my mind: Where does Hogwarts get it's silverware? I assume it's not simply conjured up out of nothing since it seems like the ability to make something out of nothing would've come up more. This means someone (probably that bag of assholes Argus Filch) has to go to some wizard equivalent of Costco and buy bulk packs silverware. And that makes me giggle.
Fuck. You.That's it for Harry Potter, but come by next time when I'll be writing about something else, with equal parts sass, bile, and ignorance.
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